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How to Open Girls Consistently

Salutations, Friend!

Jeffy boy back again for yet another thrilling episode in the ongoing saga that is the Real Social Dynamics Newsletter.

I got some very interesting emails in my inbox this week. You know what that means: question and answer time.

Let's do it.

*** QUESTION ***

Hey Jeffy/Rest of Team,

Bootcamp this past weekend was one of the most beneficial things I've ever done...I went out and did some day-time approaches yesterday and have a question...

What's an effective opener when approaching a woman on the street who is already 'moving' (either in the opposite direction you're going, or she is about to walk by you as you're standing somewhere)?

Here's the deal - I was standing near the crosswalk (probably shouldn't have been near the traffic signals, since in retrospect this might give them a built-in excuse to 'get going') in front of a big book store in an upscale part of Chicago and approached two different women by themselves... I used the opinion opener, "Hey excuse me I need a female's opinion, do women think guys should be friends with their ex'es?"

In both approaches the girls were fairly friendly and maybe a little curious, but gave fairly short answers and I didn't have their attention for very long and then they were on their way.

The second one was a 10 and seemed somewhat receptive, and I think if I had had a tighter response/interplay with her she may have stayed and talked...

Is the opinion opener good for such a situation, or is there potentially a more effective type of opener for stopping a woman on the street? After she responds, what should I follow up with?

Thanks!

Mike

>>>>>> MY REPLY:

Okay. First off, it's important to remember that the opener is just a means to an end. A lot of people put undue importance on the opener, and in many cases this is just a defense mechanism to give them an excuse NOT to approach.

In other words, they see the girl, then sit there and think to themselves, "What opener? What opener?!" over and over, cycling through all their different openers in their head and weighing which one will be most suitable.

By the time they've settled on one, odds are the chick is halfway down the block.

"Oh well," they think, "I'll get the next one."

The specific opener you employ when approaching isn't as important as the ACT ITSELF.

Just go. Don't think, just GO.

It doesn't matter what you say, as long as your body language and demeanor communicates that you are confident, fun, and someone who can CONTRIBUTE to the energy of the set (by 'set' I mean any group or individual) you're approaching.

Having said that, bear in mind that the 'neutral opinion opener' is the most consistent way to open a set, regardless of the circumstances.

People have what I like to call "autopilot responses" when others approach them.

Think about the way you react when approached by a vagrant on the street asking you for money. You probably have an automatic response when faced with this scenario. "Sorry man, not today."

Now, 99 times out of 100, you walk on and go about your business.

But it's that ONE time, you think to yourself, "Wait a minute. that guy wasn't DRESSED like a homeless person, maybe he really did need help with his car (or whatever). Maybe I was just a total jerk to that guy." But you just continue to walk on down the street.

This is the same thing girls experience when you approach them from a frame where you're SEEKING rapport. They throw out their autopilot shutdown response. Maybe later, as they're walking off, they think, "Oh, maybe that guy was cool and I blew him off."

But guess what?

It doesn't even matter, because it's only three seconds 'till the next guy shows up anyway.

So THIS is the reason why we approach with the neutral opinion opener. Because it's NEUTRAL, people have no pre-programmed autopilot response to it. They will stick around until they are able to determine what exactly is going on.

And by that time, it's too late. Bwahahahahaha evil laugh.

All right, now that that's out of the way, let's take a look at the rest of your question.

We talked about autopilot responses. To avoid triggering these on the street, it's best to approach in such a way that you don't SURPRISE them. In other words, approach either head-on, or at a slight angle, where they can see you. No running up on them from behind.

When you're dealing with women on the street who are walking, it's a slightly different scenario than when dealing with a stationary target. You have to take into consideration the fact that there's INERTIA involved. They're purposefully moving toward a destination.

This means that, regardless of what opener you use, it needs to be delivered with AUTHORITY. You need to project your voice in a powerful way.

Start your opener while they're still a good distance off, maybe ten feet. It takes time for them to logically process the fact that they're being addressed. If you wait until they're within arm's reach, they're likely to pass right by before this can happen. By starting off when they're ten feet ahead of you, it gives them time to process what you're saying and stop, either right next to you or sometimes a few feet behind you.

As you deliver the opener, do not pause or hesitate to see if they are going to stop. Simply deliver the entire bit, with the same authoritative, natural tone that ASSUMES the sale.

VERY IMPORTANT: a lot of times, at this point, you'll find that the girls will sort of slow down or pause to hear what you're saying. At this point, many guys think, "BAM I'm in!" and will then move to close the distance between themselves and the target.

Guess what? As soon as you take ONE STEP, the chicks will bounce. You've got to hold your ground and just keep spitting the opener. I know it's hard, but exercise some self-restraint, okay?

If you've gotten this far, the girls should be stopped, looking at you to see what you'll say next. Right here, deliver a solid HOOK to kick-start attraction, and it's game on.

Sounds complicated?

It's really not. At the Real Social Dynamics live, in-field Bootcamps, you'll see this very process demonstrated before your eyes, along with countless other techniques, painstakingly developed over YEARS of trial and error to arrive at the most consistent, reliable method ever devised to captivate the women you desire.

On paper, the process of attraction can seem like a complicated math problem that leaves you scratching your head in befuddlement.

Once you see it demonnstrated before your eyes, that's when the light bulb goes on over your head and everything just clicks.

During your Bootcamp, you'll spend the entire weekend in an extremely intense learning environment, living the lifestyle of the Real Social Dynamics Executive Coaches as they bombard you with every sliver of pick-up knowledge in their brains.

Then, you'll go out into the field and apply what you've learned, under the watchful eyes of the coaches, who will be there every step of the way to provide encouragement and feedback.

Most students report incredible improvements in their lives by the end of the third day. Don't take my word for it, check out this success story from a former student who wrote me the following email:

*** SUCCESS STORY ***

Jeffy,

I took the LA Bootcamp in January 2005.

I really needed and enjoyed all of the encouragement given at the bootcamp and of course it is invaluable to get the instand feedback and help and corrections and insights. I was impressed by how much time and energy the coaches put into helping me; they were genuinely interested in my improvement.They motivated me by example; I was very surprised to witness the constant high quality reactions they were getting from the sets.

They were also there to answer questions and help point me in the right direction. Everything was great and went great! The coaches were there all the way from picking out clothes - to watching all my sets, everyone was awesome!

This was the best, most awesome experience. I know for sure, without even a shadow of doubt that field training filled in a lot of gaps from just studying theory.

I learned so much that I couldn't cover it all in a few short lines. If anyone is thinking of taking a Bootcamp, I highly recommend it.

- David S., OP Kansas

>>>>>> MY REPLY:

David, your experience is pretty common among people who take the program. Most beginners will find themselves opening sets consistently. Intermediate students should be opening and building attraction in every set, and advanced students will find their game at top level after taking the bootcamp.

Simply put, this is the most inexpensive product of its kind on the market today. No one else offers this level of intense, personalized one-on-one coaching at this price. And the fact of the matter is, we just won't be able to offer it at this price much longer before it starts to adversely affect our bottom line.

Don't be caught kicking yourself because you missed out!

To learn more and sign up for your Bootcamp today, visit our site:

http://www.realsocialdynamics.com/education/bootcamps.asp

All right, let's hit up another question from the mailbag.

*** QUESTION ***

Hey Dude,

Love your write up. Can really relate to it.

I am a pretty confident guy but I suck in conversation starters, especially when I don't know the person.

I read in a Sydney paper an article about what you do and you were talking something about what type questions men should ask women to get some serious interaction and conversation.

You know something really different from those questions like, My name is Amir what's yours or do come here often? What do you do? I mean once I get into the conversation I am away, but I just stumble on getting creative on the conversation starters. Maybe I try to hard?

Would appreciate your feed back and maybe some pointers on some lines you have used to start conversation.

Thanks, Amir

>>>>>> MY REPLY:

I chose this question because it relates to Mike's question above. What we're talking about here are OPENERS, the 'lines' you use to initiate conversation.

Like I told Mike, people have autopilot responses when approached. The types of lines you mention are what we would call "seeking rapport". Put another way, when you approach using this kind of opener, you come across as NEEDY and of LOW VALUE.

Not surprisingly, then, these are the types of approaches that will get you blown off very quickly. The curt, dismissive, "I don't know," or even worse, the "no response and backturn".

So yeah, when you wonder if you are maybe trying too hard, you're dead on.

Try approaching with something more neutral. For example, ask her for an opinion on a topic UNRELATED TO HER. Something that was on your mind already that you are interested in.

Here's a sample: I'm walking through the club and I see a girl that interests me. I tap her on the arm and say, "Hey, check it out, I want your opinion. What do you think is better: Thug Lovin' or Gangsta Lovin'?"

At this point, the chick laughs and answers, "Thug."

I reply, "Yeah, that's what I thought too. I thought gangsta would be more disrespectful, like they'd pistol whip you and throw you out of the stretch Navigator. Thug is more sensitive, like Tupac."

By this time, the chick is rolling on the floor, and I roll into my usual game plan. She's opened.

Now, I'm not recommending you use this verbatim. I used this example because thug vs. gangsta lovin' is something I think about as I go about my business. You could ask her what the best flavor of ice cream is, it doesn't matter. The point is, ask her something you genuinely want to get a female opinion on. This way, your opener will come across as congruent, not contrived.

That's the most important thing: congruence. The opener is largely irrelevant as long as your approach is confident and congruent with who you are.

Statistically speaking, though, the opinion opener is the most consistent way to get the sets to open up to being gamed. After that, it's off to the races, so to speak.

Hope that helps.

Before I wrap things up here, I'd like to take the opportunity to mention RSD Personalized Workshops. This is an experience just as fulfilling as an Individualized Bootcamp, but with an added twist: instead of working with just ONE Executive Coach, you'll have the opportunity to be instructed and critiqued by several, over the course of a weekend.

Just like in the bootcamp, you'll be carpet-bombed with information during the day, and parachute into the field at night, commando-style, to wing with the instructors in teams. You'll be pushed to your limits, then pushed some more, with the instructors right there by your side to provide the intensely detailed feedback you need to rocket your game to the next level.

The fact of the matter is, our live programs are, bar none, the best and fastest way to upgrade your game to the next level.

This is the stuff that has been developed through years of work in the field, 7 nights a week and is empirically verifiable as the best, most efficient system out there when it comes to pulling the hottest ass at will.

If you're comfortable with spending an indeterminate number of years of your all-too-short life languishing in "pick-up purgatory", that's fine. Delete this email and forget all about it.

But if you want to take charge of your love life and see massive improvements in WEEKS, not years, follow that impulse and sign up for a live program TODAY! For more information and a complete program listing, check this out:

http://www.realsocialdynamics.com/education/schedule.asp

Anyways, {!name}, I hope you enjoy reading these things as much as I enjoy writing them. Keep the feedback coming, and I'll hold my end of the deal, okay?

'Till next time, play on.

Sincerely,

Jeffy, Executive Coach REAL SOCIAL DYNAMICS

PS...Do you have any questions or success stories that you'd like to see in this newsletter? Keep it brief, email them to me at jlaix@realsocialdynamics.com and I'll answer them personally. I'll provide the solution to any challenge you can possibly put to me. Remember: even if an obstacle seems "big" to you, our team has probably faced it hundreds of times, so we can solve
it in a SNAP.

Copyright 2004/2005 Real Social Dynamics Inc., All Rights Reserved. Real Social Dynamics is a trademark of Real Social Dynamics Inc. You agree to all of the following by accepting and reading this: You understand this to be an expression of opinions and not professional advice. It is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes. You are solely responsible for the use of the ideas, concepts, and content and hold Real Social Dynamics Inc. and all members and affiliates harmless in any event or claim. If you are under the age of 18, please go to the link at the end of this e-letter to stop receiving it or send mail to "RSD" 8491 West Sunset Boulevard, #452, West Hollywood, CA 90069.




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